August 2002 / Here I am sitting in the fog...

Here I am sitting in the fog, week after week, during my entire vacation, all the long gray summer long. Cold, and yearning for the sun to defeat the fog, burn it up like always, like every morning. But this summer the sun didn't win. The summer was taken away by the thick cloud we live in. The cloud sits on the earth, tired old thing, but won't rain out, no. This cloud holds onto the low pressure, and sits and spreads out, pulls in a little but not too long and it's back.

My thoughts grow inward from the cloud, condense and diffuse. Mentally I am over stimulated with the projects on the table. I will finally learn how to have a web business. Yes. The goddess has come to that. But before that glorious realization, I needed to create products and not be engaged in writing anything new. Of course with that demand I want to write something new terribly bad. But if I don't learn to market what I have already created then how do I move forward? So I am an old dog who loves to learn new tricks.

Creation number one: "Summoning the Fates" (formerly with Random House) will come out as a Print-on-Demand book. After exploring this for a while we found somebody local to do this venture with. We have no idea what this means, but just knowing the next step is good enough for me. Players in the Universe. Creation two: Grandmother of Time on CD. Tatata! A young friend actor from Berkeley U read the entire book on disc. I now have to learn to edit it, because nobody else can. Imagine. An other new trick!

Now its two days later and the sun has finally come out! Already I am more hopeful. The festival will have lovely weather! My prayers have been answered.

Very pleased as the festival women are coming together. Still working on the Sweat Lodge part of the Thursday night. It's not easy. Beverly Little Thunder said we should all gather the twigs and logs for it ourselves. I said, that's not practical. City women let loose to gather sprigs in the dusk hours in a strange forest with poison oaks? I don't think so. Can we just rent the little sweatlodges? There must be somewhere where they are prefab. Beverly Little thunder almost died listening to me. Sweatlodges are not prefab! She cried on the phone.

So I am now investigating the truth of this. We have never tried to have sweat lodges before, this is our first. Wish me luck!

I am sending this off now,later musings come as I get turned on to do them.

Love to you all

Zsuzsanna